That's why I never know the what's going on a sporting events. But the ones at the dentist... I mean eye doctor's office that they hover in front of my face make me see red too.
In astronomy class the teacher set-up a telescope with a sunspot viewing plate that uses light coming from the eyepiece to project the image onto a piece of paper. One of the students asked what would happen if you looked directly into the eyepiece. He said "It'll singe the hair on the back of your head a little". It took a few seconds to figure out what he meant.
The scraper was the one I hated the most. I would whimper and beg for them to be gentle while they did their scraping business around my tender, prone-to-bleeding gums.
For me it's the fluoride. Better not swallow that stuff? Oh, you're salivating? Good luck finding a spot to spit it out.
I swear, every time I visit the dentist I spend the first half-hour of the drive home sporadically spitting stuff out the window whenever my mouth fills up with fluoride stuff.
We get to play video games in the waiting room and pick out a cheap reward at the end, so my dentist's office is, overall, pretty cool. Many a time I have left that place with twitchy fingers and a pack of sugarless gum, or some dollar-store trinket I found unusually fascinating.
I was scared to death of the dentist when I was a kid, he once called me a baby and kicked me out of his office. I told him he had stinky breathe... ahh, the joys of childhood.
I beg to differ, that just means you have all your eggs in one basket. You get a cavity, whatcha gonna do? And replacement beaks are so hard to find in the right size and species, especially ones that don't crack when you bite down on something hard.
The worst part is when you bite down on someone's arm and the beak shatter and gets pieces stuck in their deep tissue. You can't eat anything for like two days because you have to get the dang thing replaced.
On the bright side, they end up needing surgery and lots of shots, so it's a pretty simple matter tracking down that attempted rapist and bringing him to justice. Just look through the hospital.
Yeah, but if you're a rapist you probably had it coming. Lesson learned the hard way. Unless you have a broken beak fetish, in which case, lesson definitely *not* learned.
Am I the only person who really likes to have their teeth cleaned? Sometimes I think I'm weirder than I think I am. Also that is probably the best mortified face I habe ever seen.
I too like having my teeth cleaned Goby. If you are a freak because you like the dentist, at least now you are not the only freak in here, so don't worry.
Also the only thing I don't like is having to wait several hours before I can eat something again.
I think I would only get 3 bites in before my stomach rejected the ubersweetness. And in relation to the topic at hand, I imagine it would give me some serious cavities.
That's only good if you have an unending supply of milk. Otherwise, the peanut butter gets stuck to the roof of your mouth forever, and then you can't talk normally and then you lose your social acceptance and therefore your peanut butter and chocolate chip sandwich. I probably put too much thought into that.
See, that's not an issue with me. I don't have social acceptance either way, so I have nothing to lose. Oh wait, forgot about the metaphor... dang, I have no sandwich now.
The new optical equipment is entirely constructed from LEGOs and citrus fruits. They must be replaced regularly. Performance in tests has been spotty at best, but always highly acidic.
I have never trusted the LEGO corporation's optometry branch. I mean, it's the same guys who think eyes are perfectly circular black dots, for pete's sake!
I distrust their dermatology lab for similar reasons. NO ONE IS THAT YELLOW.
Seriously? Although the newer series minifigures aren't as bright yellow as the classic stuff, which is what I was thinking of. I didn't think it was physically possible, even for Asian people. I am now retracting this assumption, both humbled and impressed by your skin tone.
Ugh, I got a black eye in gym after being elbowed in the face, so the nurse made me go to optometrist, I swear it was worse than the black eye. I waited 2 hours to see the doctor, he put drops in my eyes that dilated my pupils so for hours after I got home I had to be in a dark room or else the blinding light would give me a headache, and I had to talk about 15 x-rays because my eyelashes kept getting in the way. After all that, he told me my eyes weren't damaged at all, something I had asserted the entire time. Boo optometrist. Well, he was actually an ophthalmologist, but same difference.
/endrant
When I was a kid, I had the awful fortune of getting teeth pulled on four different occasions. I distinctly remember the first time; or rather, the last thing I remember before blacking out is thrashing about and screaming like I was about to be placed in a medieval torture device, or perhaps some sort of alien experiment.
Technically, according to my basic understanding of the Geneva Convention, you were placed into a medieval torture device. Now, I maybe a simple country Space Chicken Lawyer, but I think you might have a case.
I have to say Cooper should reiterate to the Doctor just what he's scraping and what's going to be left behind to be sucked up by the tube. I have never had a dentist talk to me in such a vile and inappropriate manner!
But Cooper THINKS he is at the Optometrist. Having the doctor repeat what he is going to do will only make it worse.
What if Cooper says his eyes don't need scraping? Would you put that kind of a challenge out there to a Dentist? He might do it just to prove you wrong.
Comments - page: 1 2 3 4 5
whitneylea (+7)
7 months ago
Rated +1
This can be very traumatizing to a little kid, you know.
ShineTilly (+25)
7 months ago
Rated +1
The giant binoculars will make you see red circles if you stare at it too long.
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +1
No, that's when you look at the sun with regular binoculars, even if you wear sunglasses.
ShineTilly (+25)
7 months ago
Rated +1
That's why I never know the what's going on a sporting events. But the ones at the dentist... I mean eye doctor's office that they hover in front of my face make me see red too.
CarVac (+55)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I looked into the sun when I was little. Nothing bad happened.
I'm not gonna try it with binoculars.
Wait. Technically, aren't glasses binoculars as in bi = 2 and ocular = eyes?
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +2
In astronomy class the teacher set-up a telescope with a sunspot viewing plate that uses light coming from the eyepiece to project the image onto a piece of paper. One of the students asked what would happen if you looked directly into the eyepiece. He said "It'll singe the hair on the back of your head a little". It took a few seconds to figure out what he meant.
Rare (+4194) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +2
Is Cooper drawing a Daisy Owl comic?
shamille (+41)
7 months ago
Rated +1
too many crayons.
unless they're all different shades of gray
slate, steel, cloudy day, grampa's hair, soul...
zetoastking (+342)
7 months ago
Rated +2
He is drawing this strip.
Daisy Owl--now in fractal!
StaceyG (+77)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Number 1 or number 2? A or B? This one or this one? Better or worse? I love how the optometrist changes it up for each lens!!
Jonny (+1492)
7 months ago
Rated 0
And the sexy frames you wear are to die for.
HIMYNAMEISCARL (+40)
7 months ago
Rated 0
The scraper was the one I hated the most. I would whimper and beg for them to be gentle while they did their scraping business around my tender, prone-to-bleeding gums.
pkuky (+38)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I like the scraper! it scratches in all those faraway itchy places I can't reach. it's the sucker I hate.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +2
For me it's the fluoride. Better not swallow that stuff? Oh, you're salivating? Good luck finding a spot to spit it out.
I swear, every time I visit the dentist I spend the first half-hour of the drive home sporadically spitting stuff out the window whenever my mouth fills up with fluoride stuff.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Should be and exclamation point after second sentence there. Now it's all weird.
CarVac (+55)
7 months ago
Rated 0
SO GLAD I'm past fluoride.
I hated that.
Oddly, I never minded drills or novocaine or scrapers. I fell asleep once during a cleaning.
tom (+222)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I believe as long as you get a lollipop afterward it's worth it.
CarVac (+55)
7 months ago
Rated +2
your DENTIST (oops i meant eye doctor) gives you lollipops?!?!? I want that dentist.
...I guess it's good business.
zetoastking (+342)
7 months ago
Rated -1
Mine gives me a terrible toothbrush and screaming gums.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
We get to play video games in the waiting room and pick out a cheap reward at the end, so my dentist's office is, overall, pretty cool. Many a time I have left that place with twitchy fingers and a pack of sugarless gum, or some dollar-store trinket I found unusually fascinating.
Tremorghost18 (-233)
7 months ago
Rated -1
well i get to play with children toys, dood.
igloolik (-5)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Oh, I kinda like the scraper...compared to the water pick, that is. Man, that thing HURTS!
Rare (+4194) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +2
This sounds like my last date.
helios (+53)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Not the Dentist! NOO!!!! Cooper! Be Brave!
DayLateHero (+12)
7 months ago
Rated +2
My mom used to pull this same stunt with me all the time.
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +3
And now Cooper will be afraid of the eye doctor.
Mr Owl needs Daisy's infinite wizdom.
Kostabi (+5)
7 months ago
Rated +5
I used to always try to fight the sucker away with my tongue. It's probably why the dentist was never gentle with me.
whitneylea (+7)
7 months ago
Rated +1
I was scared to death of the dentist when I was a kid, he once called me a baby and kicked me out of his office. I told him he had stinky breathe... ahh, the joys of childhood.
Capissen (+98)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Mr. Owl clearly *meant* well...
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +5
Mr Owl's Little Shop of Horrors!
He just doesn't know how horrible a trip to the dentist is... you know... cause he has a beak.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +3
I beg to differ, that just means you have all your eggs in one basket. You get a cavity, whatcha gonna do? And replacement beaks are so hard to find in the right size and species, especially ones that don't crack when you bite down on something hard.
Stupid plastic beaks.
Spazit (+296)
7 months ago
Rated +1
I too have experienced the horror of plastic beaks. Don't ask.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +1
The worst part is when you bite down on someone's arm and the beak shatter and gets pieces stuck in their deep tissue. You can't eat anything for like two days because you have to get the dang thing replaced.
On the bright side, they end up needing surgery and lots of shots, so it's a pretty simple matter tracking down that attempted rapist and bringing him to justice. Just look through the hospital.
Spazit (+296)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Actually, the worst part is when your arm is bitten down upon, and the beak shatters and pieces get stuck in your arm.
Then you have to pay for the sugergy, and face rape charges for someone biting down on your arm...
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Yeah, but if you're a rapist you probably had it coming. Lesson learned the hard way. Unless you have a broken beak fetish, in which case, lesson definitely *not* learned.
Spazit (+296)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Broken beak fetish - several levels below broken car fetish.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Break that window, baby!
GobyCow (+97)
7 months ago
Rated +3
Am I the only person who really likes to have their teeth cleaned? Sometimes I think I'm weirder than I think I am. Also that is probably the best mortified face I habe ever seen.
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated +2
Yes, Goby. It's just you. Only you. Ever.
zac_bogen (+126)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Agreed, you apparently have had no scaring experiences with your dentist. Give it time, you will join us.
inhumanyuyin (+7)
7 months ago
Rated +1
I too like having my teeth cleaned Goby. If you are a freak because you like the dentist, at least now you are not the only freak in here, so don't worry.
Also the only thing I don't like is having to wait several hours before I can eat something again.
GobyCow (+97)
7 months ago
Rated +3
Ah, social acceptance. This is what that feels like.
zetoastking (+342)
7 months ago
Rated +3
Please, describe it.
*sniffle*
GobyCow (+97)
7 months ago
Rated +2
It's like eating a peanut butter and chocolate chip sandwich, that never ends. Only, the bread is brown sugar cinnamon pop tarts.
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I think I would only get 3 bites in before my stomach rejected the ubersweetness. And in relation to the topic at hand, I imagine it would give me some serious cavities.
gneissisnice (+82)
7 months ago
Rated +2
That's only good if you have an unending supply of milk. Otherwise, the peanut butter gets stuck to the roof of your mouth forever, and then you can't talk normally and then you lose your social acceptance and therefore your peanut butter and chocolate chip sandwich. I probably put too much thought into that.
Kempnerius (+193)
7 months ago
Rated 0
You did, but have a +1 on me.
grammarpanda (+1)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Furthermore, it sticks to the roof of your mouth like unrequited love, making your return to social pariah that much more bittersweet. *sigh*
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
See, that's not an issue with me. I don't have social acceptance either way, so I have nothing to lose. Oh wait, forgot about the metaphor... dang, I have no sandwich now.
zetoastking (+342)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Oh, then I experience social acceptance daily!
er...alone. In a dark corner.
GobyCow (+97)
7 months ago
Rated 0
That's the best kind of acceptance, self acceptance.
mudstick (+75)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Aw, you guys.
*shniff*
That's so deep.
StaceyG (+77)
7 months ago
Rated +1
The fear that Cooper has is having his EYES scraped with the hook then the sucking out of the remainder... LOL alt text BTW!
pkuky (+38)
7 months ago
Rated 0
yeah, I think we all got that. sorry, inevitable person who didn't and only got it when reading this post.
pkuky (+38)
7 months ago
Rated +1
I've been you before.
StaceyG (+77)
7 months ago
Rated +2
there were like 8 posts before this about hating the dentist when the fear should be the optomstrist :P
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
"I have identified the problem with your vision: your eyes. Would you like some local anesthetic for the cybernetic replacement process?"
fuji2001 (+537)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Cybernetic replacement process huh? There's no word in that statement that I do not like, and how can this go horribly wrong?
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated +2
The new optical equipment is entirely constructed from LEGOs and citrus fruits. They must be replaced regularly. Performance in tests has been spotty at best, but always highly acidic.
fuji2001 (+537)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Let's see...
LEGOs have made Star Wars prequels better and Indiana Jones better, so they must make my eyes better!
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I have never trusted the LEGO corporation's optometry branch. I mean, it's the same guys who think eyes are perfectly circular black dots, for pete's sake!
I distrust their dermatology lab for similar reasons. NO ONE IS THAT YELLOW.
grammarpanda (+1)
7 months ago
Rated 0
They just need some kidneys.
fuji2001 (+537)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I'm Asian, and I am that yellow ;_;
Rainfly_X (+272)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Seriously? Although the newer series minifigures aren't as bright yellow as the classic stuff, which is what I was thinking of. I didn't think it was physically possible, even for Asian people. I am now retracting this assumption, both humbled and impressed by your skin tone.
gneissisnice (+82)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Ugh, I got a black eye in gym after being elbowed in the face, so the nurse made me go to optometrist, I swear it was worse than the black eye. I waited 2 hours to see the doctor, he put drops in my eyes that dilated my pupils so for hours after I got home I had to be in a dark room or else the blinding light would give me a headache, and I had to talk about 15 x-rays because my eyelashes kept getting in the way. After all that, he told me my eyes weren't damaged at all, something I had asserted the entire time. Boo optometrist. Well, he was actually an ophthalmologist, but same difference.
/endrant
Eggbert (+85)
7 months ago
Rated 0
That's me!
AtkinsSJ (+1)
7 months ago
Rated +1
Whoops, I didn't get it either. Thankyou, Stacey. I never would have got it otherwise. :D
I'm so ashamed.
Dunkelheit (+95)
7 months ago
Rated 0
That would be me. D'oh!
HIMYNAMEISCARL (+40)
7 months ago
Rated +1
When I was a kid, I had the awful fortune of getting teeth pulled on four different occasions. I distinctly remember the first time; or rather, the last thing I remember before blacking out is thrashing about and screaming like I was about to be placed in a medieval torture device, or perhaps some sort of alien experiment.
skipmania (+17)
7 months ago
Rated +2
The first time I had teeth pulled I punched the nurse before I blacked out.
Oops.
tom (+222)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Oh man, I bet they pulled out the wrong tooth in spite of what you did.
Or, you know, drugged you or something.
fuji2001 (+537)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Technically, according to my basic understanding of the Geneva Convention, you were placed into a medieval torture device. Now, I maybe a simple country Space Chicken Lawyer, but I think you might have a case.
GobyCow (+97)
7 months ago
Rated 0
I've heard that hyperspace completely changes the meanings of important documents and ideas. Now I know it's true!
bloomfeather (+10)
7 months ago
Rated 0
Ohohoho! Now I'm changing my picture!!!
Lazarou (+15)
7 months ago
Rated +2
I have to say Cooper should reiterate to the Doctor just what he's scraping and what's going to be left behind to be sucked up by the tube. I have never had a dentist talk to me in such a vile and inappropriate manner!
Dog Breath (+2416) (mod)
7 months ago
Rated 0
But Cooper THINKS he is at the Optometrist. Having the doctor repeat what he is going to do will only make it worse.
What if Cooper says his eyes don't need scraping? Would you put that kind of a challenge out there to a Dentist? He might do it just to prove you wrong.
Comments - page: 1 2 3 4 5
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